The New Intimacy

Sloppy Seconds okay?

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Contributor: Bignuf Bignuf
A young office mate of mine is in "early dating" of a really sweet young gal, but he went out with her KNOWING she had just been "on a date" earlier with another guy. SHE didn't let him know...but he had seen them.

They ended up in bed and he "immediately knew" she had slept with this other dude.

His rule would have been "condom time", but she is on the pill and he had none, so he had to decide, "ask her about it", "back out of the sex tonight", or "go for the sloppy seconds". He is young, horny and admits it was better to have "second course" sex then none. He went for it.

Would YOU go there? Ladies, is it okay to have a guy "go there" without telling him "someone was there, VERY recently before him"?
07/18/2011
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Contributor: JoshG JoshG
Quote:
Originally posted by Bignuf
A young office mate of mine is in "early dating" of a really sweet young gal, but he went out with her KNOWING she had just been "on a date" earlier with another guy. SHE didn't let him know...but he had seen them. ... more
Normally, I'd say it isn't a guys business what a girl does. But, in the same day? I'd definitely want to know and would be pissed if I found out after the fact.
07/21/2011
Contributor: Kkay Kkay
Sex without condoms when you're in a non-exclusive relationship isn't something I would do anyway.
07/21/2011
Contributor: Yaoi Pervette (deleted) Yaoi Pervette (deleted)
Quote:
Originally posted by Kkay
Sex without condoms when you're in a non-exclusive relationship isn't something I would do anyway.
Me neither. If she had unprotected sex with the first guy, your office mate could be exposing himself to anything the first guy might have had.
07/21/2011
Contributor: MaryExy MaryExy
I think I'd be turned off by someone sleeping with another person the same day they wanted to have sex with me... I wouldn't sleep with the person, even if condoms were involved.

And it's definitely your responsibility to tell the second (or third, or fourth...) that you slept with someone else recently (especially if you're considering going without condoms); earlier that day is definitely considered recently. One night stand is one thing... but someone you've been dating, even if it's early in the process? I wouldn't be having sex with a potential boyfriend/girlfriend who left out the "I was on a date with someone else earlier, and we had sex!"
07/22/2011
Contributor: cryinglightning86 cryinglightning86
First of all, that's incredibly insulting. Why should she be put down just because she had sex with someone else? I hate the term "sloppy seconds." Makes her sound dirty, which is terrible.

That being said, I would use protection in any sexual encounter, no matter the situation, unless I was in a committed, monogamous relationship (I am). But that's just common sense, I think.
06/26/2012
Contributor: libbyv libbyv
Quote:
Originally posted by MaryExy
I think I'd be turned off by someone sleeping with another person the same day they wanted to have sex with me... I wouldn't sleep with the person, even if condoms were involved.

And it's definitely your responsibility to tell the ... more
i agree
02/14/2013
Contributor: Martiniman Martiniman
I'm going to try to be as non-judge mental as I can here. If I were interested in sex from this young lady and only sex, yes, I would have had sex with her after she was with someone else earlier, but only with protection. However, had I been romantically interested in her I would not have had sex with her. I'd personally be wondering if she ran off after dates with me to sleep with others. Not my idea of real sweet.
02/15/2013