Old habits, do they determine current preferences.

Contributor: Gr8pumpkin Gr8pumpkin
To all,

I was wondering how old experiences determine current and future preferences sexually.
It has been a long time since I have been able to climax while receiving oral from my wife.
Yesterday I did and it occurred to me it may have been the way she did it. By my suggestion, she knelt in front of me and just used her mouth, no hands. It only took a few minutes for me to have a roaring orgasm, and after the fact I recalled that that is the way my ex did it, and the way I experienced oral for the first time. My thinking is those early experiences get hard wired into our sexuality and sets the pattern for the future. We will experiment again with it, but for now I am so happy it worked.
What are your thoughts on this ? Do you follow old patterns ?
04/10/2017
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Contributor: Gunsmoke Gunsmoke
I can sympathize with your plight - I too have a very hard time having an orgasm (almost 63). The odd thing is that when she was young - and a reluctant BJ participant, she would use her hands as much as she could. I thought it was a copout. Now she's a bit of a BJ enthusiast - and she does it right, she goes deep and no hands, but alas to no avail.

Since anal sex is the most reliable way for me to have an orgasm - and bless her soul after 27 years of no - see obliges me now pretty much anytime I want.

Back to the BJ - my guess is that if she used her hands like the old days - she might be able to make me cum - but it would have nothing to do with history and everything to do with friction.
04/10/2017
Contributor: Gr8pumpkin Gr8pumpkin
Quote:
Originally posted by Gunsmoke
I can sympathize with your plight - I too have a very hard time having an orgasm (almost 63). The odd thing is that when she was young - and a reluctant BJ participant, she would use her hands as much as she could. I thought it was a copout. Now ... more
I think our early sexual experiences set the pattern that we use later. For example, if your first experience with sex is from manual stimulation, that may be your preferred way to get off going forward. And the techniques you used will be the ones you respond to better. Until lately I had been using porn in conjunction to masturbation to orgasm when my wife and I are not being sexually active together. Then I realized the the pattern was counterproductive to our mutual pleasure and have been trying to change that. I came upon a notion to try to mimic my earliest method of masturbation and did that several times, which made me realize the issue with oral, wrong positioning and motion. We will continue to experiment with the oral, and see if it was only a one time thing or the formula for consistent play.
04/11/2017
Contributor: Gunsmoke Gunsmoke
Quote:
Originally posted by Gr8pumpkin
I think our early sexual experiences set the pattern that we use later. For example, if your first experience with sex is from manual stimulation, that may be your preferred way to get off going forward. And the techniques you used will be the ones ... more
I have not found that my early sexual experiences have much of an impact or influence in my current sex life. Interesting that you do, best of luck with your exploration.
04/11/2017