The New Intimacy

How well do you know your partner?

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Contributor: Gunsmoke Gunsmoke
I work pretty hard at understanding the anatomy and physiology of female sexual arousal - but try to never let the mechanics get in the way by staying in the moment with my lover.

Yesterday my lover (spouse)gave me the greatest complement I've ever had when she confided that I seemed to know more about her (sexually) than she knows herself! That I have given her orgasms far more intense than she has achieved on her own! Pretty cool I thought!

Question #1: Is it possible to know your partner better than they know themselves - or is it just flattery?

Question #2: Do you know your spouse better than they know themselves?
01/04/2010
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Contributor: Sir Sir
Of course it's possible to know a person better than they know themselves. And I sometimes feel that I do, yes, but I do not believe that she wants to admit that I do.
01/04/2010
Contributor: Raven Raven
What a wonderful compliment from your wife. Definitely cool.

I can address #1 and #2 together - Yes, I think it's possible, because I honestly think I know my husband better than he knows himself. I've introduced him to a lot of things sexually and some of them he swore he would not be interested in, but he went along for me and lo and behold, he found he liked them.

This applies to other areas as well. Loving someone and being attentive to what they say and do will usually reward you with insight into that person and may allow you to understand parts of them that they don't fully understand.
01/04/2010
Contributor: removedacnt removedacnt
Answer #1: Yes.

But I don't think it's that you know your partner better. My husband can give me much better orgasms that I can by myself. First, he has the real deal. My toys are just a pale substitute for him. I even wrote a story on EdenCafe about him being my favorite toy. Also I can fanticize while I'm by myself. But it isn't as good as acting out what I can imagine. Plus all the things combined just make real sex with the right person so much better than anything I could ever do alone.

Answer #2: I don't know for sure. You would have to ask him that. But I know that I try to please him as much, if not more, than he pleases me.
01/04/2010
Contributor: removedacnt removedacnt
Quote:
Originally posted by Raven
What a wonderful compliment from your wife. Definitely cool.

I can address #1 and #2 together - Yes, I think it's possible, because I honestly think I know my husband better than he knows himself. I've introduced him to a lot of things ... more
Well when you put it that way. Then yes, you're right. I never thought of it like that.
01/04/2010
Contributor: Gunsmoke Gunsmoke
Quote:
Originally posted by Raven
What a wonderful compliment from your wife. Definitely cool.

I can address #1 and #2 together - Yes, I think it's possible, because I honestly think I know my husband better than he knows himself. I've introduced him to a lot of things ... more
Raven - Thanks for the feedback. I appreciate your insight on how this can work in areas of our relationship - I'm going to work on that.
01/04/2010
Contributor: Gunsmoke Gunsmoke
Quote:
Originally posted by removedacnt
Answer #1: Yes.

But I don't think it's that you know your partner better. My husband can give me much better orgasms that I can by myself. First, he has the real deal. My toys are just a pale substitute for him. I even wrote a story ... more
Newme - Thanks for your insights. Sometimes I overlook the importance of my participation vs. orchestration. I'm sure my wife would agree with you.
01/04/2010
Contributor: removedacnt removedacnt
Quote:
Originally posted by Gunsmoke
Newme - Thanks for your insights. Sometimes I overlook the importance of my participation vs. orchestration. I'm sure my wife would agree with you.
I'm sorry but I have to laugh. That was a very cute and sweet comment.

Never overlook or underestimate the importance of your participation.
01/04/2010
Contributor: Raven Raven
Quote:
Originally posted by Gunsmoke
Raven - Thanks for the feedback. I appreciate your insight on how this can work in areas of our relationship - I'm going to work on that.
From your posts, I'm betting you have a handle on that already.
01/04/2010
Contributor: Raven Raven
Quote:
Originally posted by removedacnt
Answer #1: Yes.

But I don't think it's that you know your partner better. My husband can give me much better orgasms that I can by myself. First, he has the real deal. My toys are just a pale substitute for him. I even wrote a story ... more
We definitely have something in common. I also consider my husband to be my absolute favorite toy. They don't come any better.
01/04/2010
Contributor: removedacnt removedacnt
Quote:
Originally posted by Raven
We definitely have something in common. I also consider my husband to be my absolute favorite toy. They don't come any better.
Yes we do. And yes they are. LOL! If you would like to read it, one of the stories I wrote for EdenCafe is called "My Favorite Toy". Here's the link to it.
01/04/2010
Contributor: BlessedRaven BlessedRaven
I think it's possible to know your partner better. Mine knows more about little things than I have imagined. I'm still learning about my boyfriend. I know a lot about him, but I feel like I could learn so much more over time.
01/04/2010
Contributor: Gunsmoke Gunsmoke
Quote:
Originally posted by removedacnt
Yes we do. And yes they are. LOL! If you would like to read it, one of the stories I wrote for EdenCafe is called "My Favorite Toy". Here's the link to it.
Beautifully written - thanks for the link...
01/04/2010
Contributor: Raven Raven
Quote:
Originally posted by removedacnt
Yes we do. And yes they are. LOL! If you would like to read it, one of the stories I wrote for EdenCafe is called "My Favorite Toy". Here's the link to it.
Ah, Newme, that was terrific!!! I absolutely loved it.

I had already told my husband of your lovely line about your husband being your favorite toy, and so I read your article to him, too. I was sitting across from him and he actually got a little glassy-eyed and said it was beautiful. Then a moment later he asked, "You sure you didn't write that?" LOL
01/04/2010
Contributor: removedacnt removedacnt
Thank you very much Gunsmoke and Raven!

Raven, I'm glad your husband liked it as well. That's very sweet that he thought it was something that you would write. He obviously knows he's loved and appreciated.
01/04/2010
Contributor: Raven Raven
Quote:
Originally posted by removedacnt
Thank you very much Gunsmoke and Raven!

Raven, I'm glad your husband liked it as well. That's very sweet that he thought it was something that you would write. He obviously knows he's loved and appreciated.
As I said, we have something in common.
01/04/2010