The New Intimacy

My girlfriend likes anal, but I'm a 'back door virgin.' How do I go about initiating my 'first time?'

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Contributor: MrSinister MrSinister
We have talked about anal sex before, I just don't know how to initiate the back door play. She has told me once before "If you want to do it, just do it" but it doesn't seem that easy to me. What do you recommend?

Comments are appreciated! Thank you in advance!
Answers (private voting - your screen name will NOT appear in the results):
Just jump in and do it!
Communicate. Talk during sex, so you don't surprise her.
28  (100%)
Wait for her to take initiative and say "Stick it in my ass!"
Other (please comment below)
Total votes: 28
Poll is closed
07/19/2011
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Contributor: GingerAnn GingerAnn
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07/19/2011
Contributor: MrSinister MrSinister
Feel free to share your first time experiences, and how you broke down this wall. Thanks again!
07/19/2011
Contributor: Gunsmoke Gunsmoke
It doesn't ring true that because your wife says if you want to just do it - that she likes it. If she really likes it, she be pressing you to do it.

There are dozens of threads here that talk about the precautions for 1st time anal sex - lube, fingers, toys, built up, go slow - the obvious. I suggest you do a search and read the threads - there is advice from dozens of contributors.
07/19/2011
Contributor: lanky lanky
communication is key
07/19/2011
Contributor: cobiffle cobiffle
just rub down there and if she seems okay with it then go with it
07/19/2011
Contributor: P'Gell P'Gell
Like Gunsmoke said, there are a lot of threads dealing with this.

It can also take a month or more of conditioning and training to have full on anal sex. You NEVER just "stick it in." You could hurt her.

I'm tired and just can't type it all again now.... but many of us have put lots of good hints about anal and how to learn it on about 1000 other threads.

Here's a link to the first 10 pages link
07/19/2011
Contributor: null null
Communication is always the best option!
07/19/2011
Contributor: stlouisxxx stlouisxxx
Lube, communicate, lube, finger her ass, more lube, maybe another finger, a lot more lube then you 2 should be ready for it. Let her back onto your dick, & once in wait until she starts pushing back. If she says stop, then by all means stop.
07/19/2011
Contributor: SexyLilPixi SexyLilPixi
When I was first successful we were fooling around on the couch. He was on top of me getting ready to go in door #1 when he accidentally moved over to door #2. Before he could fix himself I started pushing up on him & nodded & we just slowly (very slowly) eased it in. It was HOT, and the first time it was fully enjoyable, but it took a lot of patience & then we were doing it enjoyably in no time.

It DEFINITELY helps make it more pleasurable if you're playing with her other parts during the process too.
07/19/2011
Contributor: The Curious Couple The Curious Couple
For sure communication. She has to let you know what feels good and what hurts.
07/20/2011
Contributor: Bignuf Bignuf
Quote:
Originally posted by MrSinister
We have talked about anal sex before, I just don't know how to initiate the back door play. She has told me once before "If you want to do it, just do it" but it doesn't seem that easy to me. What do you recommend?

Comments ... more
She will KNOW it is coming, since, for the "first time" you better spend an hour playing gently back there with your finger, tongue, a TON of lube and lots of gentle anal play. THEN ask "are you ready" before ever THINKING of putting your penis in there. PLUS...my own suggestion, do it MISSIONARY STYLE or with her on her side...DO NOT go "doggy". I have simply heard my own friends say and my own experience tell me that it is FAR more comfortable...especial ly for a newbie, to be in a missionary (butt on pillow, legs up) position.

ENJOY.

OH...forget the porn star crap. GO SLOW. Let HER control the speed if she says "wait, or stop", and for the first few times, just GO IN (and if IN is not all the way, then THAT IS FINE TOO). Just enjoy the feel. NO THRUSTING AT ALL...till you BOTH know what you are doing.
07/20/2011
Contributor: Bignuf Bignuf
Quote:
Originally posted by null
Communication is always the best option!
Amen.
07/20/2011
Contributor: Bignuf Bignuf
Quote:
Originally posted by MrSinister
Feel free to share your first time experiences, and how you broke down this wall. Thanks again!
My first anal was with a date who simply was kissing everywhere and when he got to my rosebud, I was young, inexperienced and sure had no idea I was NOT supposed to just enjoy it...so I did. He was a gentle patient lover and it ALL felt great, and I have been an anal fan since. All gain, NO pain.
07/20/2011
Contributor: Sex'и'Violence Sex'и'Violence
we worked into it. First rimming, then massaging it while she was being penetrated vaginally, and finally actually going for full anal penetration. Just remember to take it slow at first until she gets into the motion.
07/24/2011
Contributor: Powder Powder
She actually brought it up. She was curious, so we tried it.
11/01/2011