The New Intimacy

#Workshop - October 3rd @ 8pm EST: Prostate massage 101

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Contributor: ToyTimeTim ToyTimeTim
Quote:
Originally posted by Ansley
Late to the party! Shame on me! After I bragged about always being on time!! (And I totally typed top instead of time, first.)
Oh sure! (top is good too )
10/03/2011
Contributor: ToyTimeTim ToyTimeTim
Quote:
Originally posted by Antipova
Question:

Spit has always been good enough for me, even for pretty vigorous anal sex. Am I just tougher than average, or is it because I had been 'practicing' for a few years before I had a partner, or what's up with it, in general?
OK, so yes, it does work but only if your spit is thick. If it is watery it may not work as good or last as long. While I have not used it for anal play, I have used it for masturbation numerous times. I kind of just through that in for general purposes.

If it works for you, then by all means, use it.
10/03/2011
Contributor: Ansley Ansley
When I first brought up anal, I made a promise to keep my nails very short. So, now it's kind of become a naughty secret when super-girly-girls say something about my short "unmanicured" nails and why I keep them that way when I could be sooo pretty. I just laugh and say I don't have time.
10/03/2011
Contributor: ToyTimeTim ToyTimeTim
Quote:
Originally posted by Ansley
When I first brought up anal, I made a promise to keep my nails very short. So, now it's kind of become a naughty secret when super-girly-girls say something about my short "unmanicured" nails and why I keep them that way when I could ... more
haha, ever tell the truth just to see what they say?
10/03/2011
Contributor: ToyTimeTim ToyTimeTim
Ready for more...
10/03/2011
Contributor: ToyTimeTim ToyTimeTim
All right then, you/he are clean and ready to begin. You have a bottle of lube ready and a towel to lie on (A Liberator Throe is even better) and a glove. For the best results you/he should be in an excited state, so do whatever you like to do to get there. When the guy is sexually excited the Prostate will swell, much like the G-spot, and this will help in finding it. Guys may want to watch some porn or read erotica or just think about their partner. Gals may want to perform some oral on them or give them some hand work.

OK, time to begin. Start with applying some lube to the finger and gently massage the anus and perineum. Some may find this ticklish or stimulating. The first time my wife massaged my perineum I could not stand it, I was VERY ticklish. If this is the case apply more pressure, this may help. As you massage the anus slowly apply more pressure with the pad of your finger. As the anus relaxes you will find that your finger will go farther and farther in, don’t rush this. Not only are you learning to relax the sphincters you are working lube into the anus. Stop when needed and add more lube. Once the pad of your finger will go in easily you can begin to apply more pressure and allow the finger to go in. For most newbie’s this is the make or break point. If you/he feels any pain stop and assess the situation; one of three things have happened. 1) More lube is needed. 2) More relaxation/massage is needed or 3) He flat out does not like it. If all goes well and your finger slides in with no problems, stop and let your finger stay in there while the anus/sphincters adjust, a minute or two will be fine. As always communication with your partner is key. If you are doing it to yourself you will feel the anus relax and you will know when you can proceed.
10/03/2011
Contributor: Ansley Ansley
Quote:
Originally posted by ToyTimeTim
haha, ever tell the truth just to see what they say?
And watch all of their Southern delicateness melt before my very eyes? I wish. But, it's usually in settings where family is involved.
10/03/2011
Contributor: Antipova Antipova
Quote:
Originally posted by Ansley
When I first brought up anal, I made a promise to keep my nails very short. So, now it's kind of become a naughty secret when super-girly-girls say something about my short "unmanicured" nails and why I keep them that way when I could ... more
Yeah, I've passed up like every 'manicure party' before all the weddings for the last few summers. Everyone tells me I'm missing out, I think to myself "actually, you are "
10/03/2011
Contributor: Antipova Antipova
Quote:
Originally posted by ToyTimeTim
All right then, you/he are clean and ready to begin. You have a bottle of lube ready and a towel to lie on (A Liberator Throe is even better) and a glove. For the best results you/he should be in an excited state, so do whatever you like to do to get ... more
Good description so far!
10/03/2011
Contributor: ToyTimeTim ToyTimeTim
My wife loves to get her nails done, but for some odd reason they never stay to long. Even the expensive kind.

Much easier to keep them short anyways.
10/03/2011
Contributor: ToyTimeTim ToyTimeTim


So, now your/their finger is in side, what to do now? This is where the excited state comes into play. Guys, do you know where a girls G-spot is? It is inside the vagina an inch or two on the front wall, right? Same holds true for the Prostate. You will find it by feeling for a bump in the rectal wall about the size of a large walnut, about two to three inches in towards the penis. It will be firmer than the rest of the anal walls but not hard like a bone. This is the prostate.

Now, for most guys now is the time when you will lose your erection. This not a bad thing, it just means that your focus is on a different area. You can leave it be or stimulate the penis until it is hard, it is up to you.

Just a bit complicated so far, eh? Well fear not, now comes the easy part. With your palm facing up and your finger in as far as you can get it, use a “come here” motion. You want to start at the top of the bump (The Prostate) and work down. You can also apply pressure and slowly thrust the finger in and out if that works better for you.
10/03/2011
Contributor: ToyTimeTim ToyTimeTim
Y'all with me? Good, now it's time to see my cock and ass.
10/03/2011
Contributor: ToyTimeTim ToyTimeTim
Just a little visual so you get the idea.


What, you thought you would see the real thing? lol
10/03/2011
Contributor: Antipova Antipova
Quote:
Originally posted by ToyTimeTim
Y'all with me? Good, now it's time to see my cock and ass.
!
10/03/2011
Contributor: Ansley Ansley
Wait...palm facing up because he's on his back? And down if he's on his knees?
10/03/2011
Contributor: jroho jroho
Quote:
Originally posted by ToyTimeTim
All right then, you/he are clean and ready to begin. You have a bottle of lube ready and a towel to lie on (A Liberator Throe is even better) and a glove. For the best results you/he should be in an excited state, so do whatever you like to do to get ... more
One good preparation technique I picked up from a video (Jaiya's Red Hot series, I think) was to roll up a washcloth that had been warmed up with hot water (not too hot!) and place it between the cheeks. This can really relax that area and it feels good, too.
10/03/2011
Contributor: hawkkman hawkkman
Quote:
Originally posted by Ansley
Wait...palm facing up because he's on his back? And down if he's on his knees?
I'll risk "palm down"
10/03/2011
Contributor: ToyTimeTim ToyTimeTim
Quote:
Originally posted by Ansley
Wait...palm facing up because he's on his back? And down if he's on his knees?
Yup, the prostate is on the front wall just like the G-spot.
10/03/2011
Contributor: Ansley Ansley
Quote:
Originally posted by ToyTimeTim
Just a little visual so you get the idea.


What, you thought you would see the real thing? lol
LOL Tease! But, I was in on the secret! Amazing what review programs do, huh?
10/03/2011
Contributor: ToyTimeTim ToyTimeTim
Quote:
Originally posted by jroho
One good preparation technique I picked up from a video (Jaiya's Red Hot series, I think) was to roll up a washcloth that had been warmed up with hot water (not too hot!) and place it between the cheeks. This can really relax that area and it ... more
Good idea, I find a nice hot bath before helps too. In fact, that where I do most of my anal play. Try a cold stainless toy during a warm bath, just divine!
10/03/2011
Contributor: Starkiller87 Starkiller87
Quote:
Originally posted by ToyTimeTim
Good idea, I find a nice hot bath before helps too. In fact, that where I do most of my anal play. Try a cold stainless toy during a warm bath, just divine!
Hrmmm good idea. We usually take baths together just to catch up on our days. So this can work into that.
10/03/2011
Contributor: ToyTimeTim ToyTimeTim
Quote:
Originally posted by Ansley
LOL Tease! But, I was in on the secret! Amazing what review programs do, huh?
I know, eh?

I had to try though.
10/03/2011
Contributor: ToyTimeTim ToyTimeTim
Quote:
Originally posted by Starkiller87
Hrmmm good idea. We usually take baths together just to catch up on our days. So this can work into that.
Hell ya, find a good silicone lube and have at it. Ever tried a massage during a bath? oooooaaahhhh
10/03/2011
Contributor: ToyTimeTim ToyTimeTim
Guess what? You are now massaging the prostate, congratulations! Not as hard as you thought, eh? You can vary the pressure from light to firm; it just depends on what is comfortable for you (just do it to hard). For beginners it may be a light pressure is all that is need or wanted. After a few strokes you may notice that the pre-cum is flowing out, this means you have got it right. Even if nothing comes out the job is still being done, when you/he climaxes everything will be forced out.


Once you are comfortable with this you can add in some penile stimulation. Watch out though; do not be surprised if he/you come in short order. Girls, do you have problems getting your man to come while giving oral and a hand job? Well this might just be what the Dr. ordered. Furthermore, I have found that when massaging the prostate and masturbating that there is always more semen that comes out verses when I just masturbate alone. I would bet that this is due to the extra seminal fluid that is produced when you massage the Prostate. So heads up. Safety glasses anyone?
10/03/2011
Contributor: True Pleasures True Pleasures
Quote:
Originally posted by ToyTimeTim
Good idea, I find a nice hot bath before helps too. In fact, that where I do most of my anal play. Try a cold stainless toy during a warm bath, just divine!
Karsai Nei Tsang is a good way to help your partner relax, too, since there are some massages to ease tension in the anal area. I do that once a month to my husband, and am planning on adding the prostate milking to our regimen.
10/03/2011
Contributor: FaerieLove FaerieLove
This is such a wonderful idea, thank you so much Tim!
10/03/2011
Contributor: ToyTimeTim ToyTimeTim
Quote:
Originally posted by True Pleasures
Karsai Nei Tsang is a good way to help your partner relax, too, since there are some massages to ease tension in the anal area. I do that once a month to my husband, and am planning on adding the prostate milking to our regimen. ... more
Ya know, that's one thing that great about massage in general. Folks have been doing it for so long for so many reasons, you can find just about anything you need or want.

Google is my BFF!
10/03/2011
Contributor: ToyTimeTim ToyTimeTim
Quote:
Originally posted by FaerieLove
This is such a wonderful idea, thank you so much Tim!
Glad to help, and glad you could make it.
10/03/2011
Contributor: ToyTimeTim ToyTimeTim
So, those are the basics of Prostate massage. Some guys may not care to go any farther than that. For the sake of time we will not go into the whys of that. For those that want to go farther, we will now look at the different style toys that are available.
10/03/2011
Contributor: ToyTimeTim ToyTimeTim
Since time is flying by, I'll step up the pace a bit.
10/03/2011