I feel like if you know your partner really well (as in years of experiance of BDSM with that partner) as well as have education some of these rules can be broken if the trust and knowledge is there.
Sex Fact: When NOT To Do Bondage
12/11/2011
This post is sadly quite needed. First timers and newbies sometimes let themselves be so blinded by their wide eyed wonder and excitement that they accidentally wind up risking their safety. Though that isn't true of everyone obviously.
12/11/2011
I've never taken unreasonable risks with my lover, if I hurt him in a way he didn't consent to being hurt, I'd never forgive myself. So, no, I've never broken any of those rules.
12/11/2011
I voted in the wrong box. I've broken one of these rules. I put handcuffs on a vanilla guy on a first date...but I doubt that's a big no-no.
01/19/2012
Haven't done anything like this before. I think a lot of communication needs to take place between the parties to avoid any risks. With what I have read in various erotica books so far, make me open minded to consider the possibilities, but talking with your partner in necessary.
01/19/2012
No. I've only actually done any bondage with one partner (so far) but I know bondage takes tons of trust, and I'm not interested in putting myself in any of these situations I want to be safe and comfortable!
01/20/2012
Negotiating is kida pointless in my situation, with my current partner, as a sub my limits are so much further than his he could go way past his and never come near mine so there has never been much need to negotiate stopping.
01/22/2012
I follow the rules.
01/23/2012
I have, but then it didn't actually happen, so it doesn't count. I mean, the bondage didn't happen.
01/30/2012
Safety ALWAYS comes first during play. Enjoying ourselves naturally comes second.
01/31/2012
Hmmmm, Guilty as charged, I've broken all of them except "Strong, Negative Emotions" and all during the same session.
But I'll do better next time, I promise.
But I'll do better next time, I promise.
01/31/2012
going4the23feel
Quote:
Alcohol is considered a form of bondage. You can have your partner drink until they're in a state suitable for taking advantage of. Kinky, am I right?
Originally posted by
Kayla
I can think of plenty of fun times that you certainly should do bondage, but what about those times when you shouldn't? In his book, Jay Wiseman gives us examples of times of when you shouldn't do any bondage:
You Don't Know the ... more
You Don't Know the ... more
I can think of plenty of fun times that you certainly should do bondage, but what about those times when you shouldn't? In his book, Jay Wiseman gives us examples of times of when you shouldn't do any bondage:
You Don't Know the Person Well: Doing bondage with someone you don't know well is never a good idea.
Intoxication: You might not be able to judge your limits or what you're doing nearly as well.
Strong, Negative Emotions: When you are significantly depressed, angry, sad, or any other negative emotion, doing bondage can push you over the edge - and not in a good way.
No Negotiation: Before all bondage, there should be a general negotiation about the scene including what each partner wants to do and any health risks.
No Education: If either partner isn't educated about the basic risks of bondage, you shouldn't participate in it.
Lack of Suitable Materials: Experimenting with new bondage materials can be fun, but when there aren't any suitable materials around that will hold weight and keep from harming someone, you shouldn't do bondage.
Have fun with your bondage, and stay safe! Private poll: Have you ever participated in bondage with any of these risk factors? Any other risk factors you want to add?
To find more sex facts like this, check out Erotic Bondage Handbook, sold on EdenFantasys, which is the book where this sex fact came from.
Have you ever broken any of these "rules"? Do you have any other bondage safety rules to share with us? less
You Don't Know the Person Well: Doing bondage with someone you don't know well is never a good idea.
Intoxication: You might not be able to judge your limits or what you're doing nearly as well.
Strong, Negative Emotions: When you are significantly depressed, angry, sad, or any other negative emotion, doing bondage can push you over the edge - and not in a good way.
No Negotiation: Before all bondage, there should be a general negotiation about the scene including what each partner wants to do and any health risks.
No Education: If either partner isn't educated about the basic risks of bondage, you shouldn't participate in it.
Lack of Suitable Materials: Experimenting with new bondage materials can be fun, but when there aren't any suitable materials around that will hold weight and keep from harming someone, you shouldn't do bondage.
Have fun with your bondage, and stay safe! Private poll: Have you ever participated in bondage with any of these risk factors? Any other risk factors you want to add?
To find more sex facts like this, check out Erotic Bondage Handbook, sold on EdenFantasys, which is the book where this sex fact came from.
Have you ever broken any of these "rules"? Do you have any other bondage safety rules to share with us? less
02/04/2012
I haven't broken any of those rules but I know people who have broken the intoxication rule. I think that one depends on the person and situation. A glass or two of wine before play isn't as big of a deal, in my opinion, as dropping acid before play. And then it also depends on the play. You shouldn't imbibe alcohol before knife or blood play because you'll bleed more.
So yea...While I haven't broken the "rules" I do think there some leeway in them too.
So yea...While I haven't broken the "rules" I do think there some leeway in them too.
02/15/2012
Quote:
never
Originally posted by
Kayla
I can think of plenty of fun times that you certainly should do bondage, but what about those times when you shouldn't? In his book, Jay Wiseman gives us examples of times of when you shouldn't do any bondage:
You Don't Know the ... more
You Don't Know the ... more
I can think of plenty of fun times that you certainly should do bondage, but what about those times when you shouldn't? In his book, Jay Wiseman gives us examples of times of when you shouldn't do any bondage:
You Don't Know the Person Well: Doing bondage with someone you don't know well is never a good idea.
Intoxication: You might not be able to judge your limits or what you're doing nearly as well.
Strong, Negative Emotions: When you are significantly depressed, angry, sad, or any other negative emotion, doing bondage can push you over the edge - and not in a good way.
No Negotiation: Before all bondage, there should be a general negotiation about the scene including what each partner wants to do and any health risks.
No Education: If either partner isn't educated about the basic risks of bondage, you shouldn't participate in it.
Lack of Suitable Materials: Experimenting with new bondage materials can be fun, but when there aren't any suitable materials around that will hold weight and keep from harming someone, you shouldn't do bondage.
Have fun with your bondage, and stay safe! Private poll: Have you ever participated in bondage with any of these risk factors? Any other risk factors you want to add?
To find more sex facts like this, check out Erotic Bondage Handbook, sold on EdenFantasys, which is the book where this sex fact came from.
Have you ever broken any of these "rules"? Do you have any other bondage safety rules to share with us? less
You Don't Know the Person Well: Doing bondage with someone you don't know well is never a good idea.
Intoxication: You might not be able to judge your limits or what you're doing nearly as well.
Strong, Negative Emotions: When you are significantly depressed, angry, sad, or any other negative emotion, doing bondage can push you over the edge - and not in a good way.
No Negotiation: Before all bondage, there should be a general negotiation about the scene including what each partner wants to do and any health risks.
No Education: If either partner isn't educated about the basic risks of bondage, you shouldn't participate in it.
Lack of Suitable Materials: Experimenting with new bondage materials can be fun, but when there aren't any suitable materials around that will hold weight and keep from harming someone, you shouldn't do bondage.
Have fun with your bondage, and stay safe! Private poll: Have you ever participated in bondage with any of these risk factors? Any other risk factors you want to add?
To find more sex facts like this, check out Erotic Bondage Handbook, sold on EdenFantasys, which is the book where this sex fact came from.
Have you ever broken any of these "rules"? Do you have any other bondage safety rules to share with us? less
02/15/2012
Thanks for the tips, they're very useful
02/15/2012
Quote:
I'd say my bf has little education and lacks suitable materials, but it's not so bad.
Originally posted by
Kayla
I can think of plenty of fun times that you certainly should do bondage, but what about those times when you shouldn't? In his book, Jay Wiseman gives us examples of times of when you shouldn't do any bondage:
You Don't Know the ... more
You Don't Know the ... more
I can think of plenty of fun times that you certainly should do bondage, but what about those times when you shouldn't? In his book, Jay Wiseman gives us examples of times of when you shouldn't do any bondage:
You Don't Know the Person Well: Doing bondage with someone you don't know well is never a good idea.
Intoxication: You might not be able to judge your limits or what you're doing nearly as well.
Strong, Negative Emotions: When you are significantly depressed, angry, sad, or any other negative emotion, doing bondage can push you over the edge - and not in a good way.
No Negotiation: Before all bondage, there should be a general negotiation about the scene including what each partner wants to do and any health risks.
No Education: If either partner isn't educated about the basic risks of bondage, you shouldn't participate in it.
Lack of Suitable Materials: Experimenting with new bondage materials can be fun, but when there aren't any suitable materials around that will hold weight and keep from harming someone, you shouldn't do bondage.
Have fun with your bondage, and stay safe! Private poll: Have you ever participated in bondage with any of these risk factors? Any other risk factors you want to add?
To find more sex facts like this, check out Erotic Bondage Handbook, sold on EdenFantasys, which is the book where this sex fact came from.
Have you ever broken any of these "rules"? Do you have any other bondage safety rules to share with us? less
You Don't Know the Person Well: Doing bondage with someone you don't know well is never a good idea.
Intoxication: You might not be able to judge your limits or what you're doing nearly as well.
Strong, Negative Emotions: When you are significantly depressed, angry, sad, or any other negative emotion, doing bondage can push you over the edge - and not in a good way.
No Negotiation: Before all bondage, there should be a general negotiation about the scene including what each partner wants to do and any health risks.
No Education: If either partner isn't educated about the basic risks of bondage, you shouldn't participate in it.
Lack of Suitable Materials: Experimenting with new bondage materials can be fun, but when there aren't any suitable materials around that will hold weight and keep from harming someone, you shouldn't do bondage.
Have fun with your bondage, and stay safe! Private poll: Have you ever participated in bondage with any of these risk factors? Any other risk factors you want to add?
To find more sex facts like this, check out Erotic Bondage Handbook, sold on EdenFantasys, which is the book where this sex fact came from.
Have you ever broken any of these "rules"? Do you have any other bondage safety rules to share with us? less
02/15/2012
These all seem very important from where I'm standing. I'm a paranoid safety freak, so no, I haven't broken one yet.
03/04/2012
I've broken only the negative emotion one, but only because my current partner, when in a state of distress/disassociatio n, feels that being controlled anchors them back to a conscious state. We're quite careful, though, and we have an agreement that if I feel they cannot handle it/are getting in a worse state, we stop.
03/05/2012
Nevr broken any rules
03/05/2012
Thanks for the post
03/07/2012
Quote:
I'm glad to say I've never broken any of these. I think it just takes common sense and direct communication for things to usually run smoothly.
Originally posted by
Kayla
I can think of plenty of fun times that you certainly should do bondage, but what about those times when you shouldn't? In his book, Jay Wiseman gives us examples of times of when you shouldn't do any bondage:
You Don't Know the ... more
You Don't Know the ... more
I can think of plenty of fun times that you certainly should do bondage, but what about those times when you shouldn't? In his book, Jay Wiseman gives us examples of times of when you shouldn't do any bondage:
You Don't Know the Person Well: Doing bondage with someone you don't know well is never a good idea.
Intoxication: You might not be able to judge your limits or what you're doing nearly as well.
Strong, Negative Emotions: When you are significantly depressed, angry, sad, or any other negative emotion, doing bondage can push you over the edge - and not in a good way.
No Negotiation: Before all bondage, there should be a general negotiation about the scene including what each partner wants to do and any health risks.
No Education: If either partner isn't educated about the basic risks of bondage, you shouldn't participate in it.
Lack of Suitable Materials: Experimenting with new bondage materials can be fun, but when there aren't any suitable materials around that will hold weight and keep from harming someone, you shouldn't do bondage.
Have fun with your bondage, and stay safe! Private poll: Have you ever participated in bondage with any of these risk factors? Any other risk factors you want to add?
To find more sex facts like this, check out Erotic Bondage Handbook, sold on EdenFantasys, which is the book where this sex fact came from.
Have you ever broken any of these "rules"? Do you have any other bondage safety rules to share with us? less
You Don't Know the Person Well: Doing bondage with someone you don't know well is never a good idea.
Intoxication: You might not be able to judge your limits or what you're doing nearly as well.
Strong, Negative Emotions: When you are significantly depressed, angry, sad, or any other negative emotion, doing bondage can push you over the edge - and not in a good way.
No Negotiation: Before all bondage, there should be a general negotiation about the scene including what each partner wants to do and any health risks.
No Education: If either partner isn't educated about the basic risks of bondage, you shouldn't participate in it.
Lack of Suitable Materials: Experimenting with new bondage materials can be fun, but when there aren't any suitable materials around that will hold weight and keep from harming someone, you shouldn't do bondage.
Have fun with your bondage, and stay safe! Private poll: Have you ever participated in bondage with any of these risk factors? Any other risk factors you want to add?
To find more sex facts like this, check out Erotic Bondage Handbook, sold on EdenFantasys, which is the book where this sex fact came from.
Have you ever broken any of these "rules"? Do you have any other bondage safety rules to share with us? less
03/07/2012
Quote:
I've definitely done some bondage while intoxicated, but in that case I usually stick to milder forms of bondage. However, some of the roughest, best sex I have ever had has involved being intoxicated. I think the key is knowing your limits and being with a partner you know well and can trust completely. And I am stealing the phrase "unscripted fluid expulsion" for future use.
Originally posted by
Hallmar82
I selected "No" when we've been drinking, but neither of us were drunk (at least nowhere near unscripted fluid expulsion). So, it's kind of a fuzzy line on that one.
03/10/2012
Quote:
Don't play while intoxicated? My sub is usually begging me to tie her when she's had a bit to drink. We've never been hammered and engaged though.
Originally posted by
Kayla
I can think of plenty of fun times that you certainly should do bondage, but what about those times when you shouldn't? In his book, Jay Wiseman gives us examples of times of when you shouldn't do any bondage:
You Don't Know the ... more
You Don't Know the ... more
I can think of plenty of fun times that you certainly should do bondage, but what about those times when you shouldn't? In his book, Jay Wiseman gives us examples of times of when you shouldn't do any bondage:
You Don't Know the Person Well: Doing bondage with someone you don't know well is never a good idea.
Intoxication: You might not be able to judge your limits or what you're doing nearly as well.
Strong, Negative Emotions: When you are significantly depressed, angry, sad, or any other negative emotion, doing bondage can push you over the edge - and not in a good way.
No Negotiation: Before all bondage, there should be a general negotiation about the scene including what each partner wants to do and any health risks.
No Education: If either partner isn't educated about the basic risks of bondage, you shouldn't participate in it.
Lack of Suitable Materials: Experimenting with new bondage materials can be fun, but when there aren't any suitable materials around that will hold weight and keep from harming someone, you shouldn't do bondage.
Have fun with your bondage, and stay safe! Private poll: Have you ever participated in bondage with any of these risk factors? Any other risk factors you want to add?
To find more sex facts like this, check out Erotic Bondage Handbook, sold on EdenFantasys, which is the book where this sex fact came from.
Have you ever broken any of these "rules"? Do you have any other bondage safety rules to share with us? less
You Don't Know the Person Well: Doing bondage with someone you don't know well is never a good idea.
Intoxication: You might not be able to judge your limits or what you're doing nearly as well.
Strong, Negative Emotions: When you are significantly depressed, angry, sad, or any other negative emotion, doing bondage can push you over the edge - and not in a good way.
No Negotiation: Before all bondage, there should be a general negotiation about the scene including what each partner wants to do and any health risks.
No Education: If either partner isn't educated about the basic risks of bondage, you shouldn't participate in it.
Lack of Suitable Materials: Experimenting with new bondage materials can be fun, but when there aren't any suitable materials around that will hold weight and keep from harming someone, you shouldn't do bondage.
Have fun with your bondage, and stay safe! Private poll: Have you ever participated in bondage with any of these risk factors? Any other risk factors you want to add?
To find more sex facts like this, check out Erotic Bondage Handbook, sold on EdenFantasys, which is the book where this sex fact came from.
Have you ever broken any of these "rules"? Do you have any other bondage safety rules to share with us? less
08/05/2012
These are great, commonsense rules.
08/05/2012
Those are all good guidelines, but I think some can be broken to a degree. You can still have safe bondage if you dont know the person super well. If you have a buddy who will call the police for you for example. There are still risks, but you can minimize them greatly. You just always need to use common sense.
08/05/2012
good info, thanks!
08/05/2012
Broken a few a while back, but none sense I actually looked into what I was doing
08/07/2012
Great list. Thanks for sharing this!
08/10/2012
I don't do pick-up play, but am lucky enough to be married to my playmate. We do stick to the rules though. It just happens that over the years we have been able to puch the limits.
09/03/2012
I've broken multiple rules, for me and my husband there's really no such thing as "suitable" bondage materials. We will use pretty much anything. The first time we used electrical tape. Also, I will play with my husband when we are slightly intoxicated.
09/03/2012