The New Intimacy

New Safe Words?

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Contributor: El-Jaro El-Jaro
There's an older post about safe words, but I thought a newer one would be better.

What safe words have you used? Which ones didn't work that well? Any make you burst out laughing?
07/01/2010
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Contributor: Kayla Kayla
I know most of the time we use the traditional "Red" and "Yellow" if we use any at all. Most of the time, he'll just whine enough that I'll stop if it's really bothering him.
07/01/2010
Contributor: ~LaUr3n~ ~LaUr3n~
No safe words, my partner and I communicate where we know boundaries before hand. IF something needs to stop...we say stop.
07/01/2010
Contributor: Carrie Ann Carrie Ann
We play like insane serial killers so I do have a safeword as "no" and "stop" and "i'm calling my lawyer" are often parts of the play. It is "powder".

I've only used it once in 8.5 years, though.

Usually we're in tune enough that we know when the play is over and it's time to stop.
07/01/2010
Contributor: Alicia Alicia
We don't use a safe word. I don't normally say "no" during sex. I will usually say "Ok stop" if I want him to stop but not really stop. Sometimes I will say "that's enough" and not mean it. He knows this and so he'll keep going if i say this. But I don't say "no" unless I mean it. If I say "no" or "No Stop" he'll stop. Of course we don't really get into all that much rough play. It's usually him just being on a rampant orgasm giving spree so I wouldn't actually be in pain and need him to stop. If we got into that kind of play we'd probably create a safeword.
07/01/2010
Contributor: Blinker Blinker
Quote:
Originally posted by Carrie Ann
We play like insane serial killers so I do have a safeword as "no" and "stop" and "i'm calling my lawyer" are often parts of the play. It is "powder".

I've only used it once in 8.5 years, ... more
HAHA! Mine's "reindeer"...I'm totally going to have to shout "I'm calling my lawyer!" during sex next time
07/01/2010
Contributor: Tori Rebel Tori Rebel
I don't have one right now, as my partner is not as experienced in heavier BDSM so everything we do right now is very light. But in a prior relationship, our safeword was 'radiator'. One of those last minute, look around the room, pick a word scenarios.
07/01/2010
Contributor: Owl Identified Owl Identified
Quote:
Originally posted by ~LaUr3n~
No safe words, my partner and I communicate where we know boundaries before hand. IF something needs to stop...we say stop.
This is how I play also. My primary partner and I are close enough that we are able to tell when something isn't working, so we don't use it all that much, but when we need to stop we just say stop. I'm also a fairly maternal top and am always very vigilant about limits, although I try to limit the verbal-checking-in-thi ng because too much of that ruins the mood.
07/01/2010
Contributor: TitsMcScandal TitsMcScandal
Kayak.

I've only had to use it once and that was because I did something stupid, not him. Usually it is just actual communication. That night I did something very triggering so the first hit had me freaking out and trying to escape the ropes. Not very fun.
07/01/2010
Contributor: El-Jaro El-Jaro
Quote:
Originally posted by TitsMcScandal
Kayak.

I've only had to use it once and that was because I did something stupid, not him. Usually it is just actual communication. That night I did something very triggering so the first hit had me freaking out and trying to escape the ... more
and it's a palindrome!
07/01/2010
Contributor: Sir Sir
We've never had a safe word, I believe that I've stated that a few places. I've been able to tell from her emotions, and if she's bitching and moaning so much, it tends to hurt my ears and annoy me, so I stop (if only for myself). HAAHAHA!!!

But even when she has a gag in her mouth, I can tell. She'll kick around and struggle a lot in those cases.
07/01/2010
Contributor: trios trios
Quote:
Originally posted by El-Jaro
There's an older post about safe words, but I thought a newer one would be better.

What safe words have you used? Which ones didn't work that well? Any make you burst out laughing?
Sorry for the naivety. What is a safe word?
07/01/2010
Contributor: Sir Sir
Quote:
Originally posted by trios
Sorry for the naivety. What is a safe word?
It's a word used in order to say "stop" during a scene, like in BDSM or sex. It basically says, "You are going into my no-no zone, stop now."
07/01/2010
Contributor: gone77 gone77
Quote:
Originally posted by Carrie Ann
We play like insane serial killers so I do have a safeword as "no" and "stop" and "i'm calling my lawyer" are often parts of the play. It is "powder".

I've only used it once in 8.5 years, ... more
I have to admit, "I'm calling my lawyer" made me laugh out loud, especially after I read that it's often part of the play. I think that's actually the one that Mistress Matisse recommends as a perfect safe word. You just blew it out of the water. lol
07/04/2010
Contributor: P'Gell P'Gell
I know you're "supposed" to have a Safe Word. My Man just never had one and he's really the only one I've Played Hard with in the way I want to. As I said in an other post, we know each other so well, that he can tell the difference between a "Oh, God stop, you're killing me!" in Play, and a "Stop, that really hurts." when I REALLY mean it. For us, it's more tone and I guess part nearly being so empathetic that it's psychically reading each other.

It's not often needed, though. He knows my "no no" zones, and my moods too well for us to often have to actually stop. I can think of twice in the past 5 years or so, I think. (Not counting, "OW, you're knee is on my hair, dammit. MOVE!")
07/10/2010
Contributor: Sir Sir
Quote:
Originally posted by P'Gell
I know you're "supposed" to have a Safe Word. My Man just never had one and he's really the only one I've Played Hard with in the way I want to. As I said in an other post, we know each other so well, that he can tell the ... more
No one is "supposed" to have a safe word. It's up to the user whether they do or not.
07/10/2010
Contributor: P'Gell P'Gell
Quote:
Originally posted by Sir
No one is "supposed" to have a safe word. It's up to the user whether they do or not.
Yeah, you're right, Sir.

But, I always feel that when I am talking to people new to D/S or BDSM I NEED to say this.....Status Quo even in this *sigh* Kinda like telling people to wrap up. (Even though we don't, personally.)
07/14/2010
Contributor: Luvasaurus Luvasaurus
Pterodactyl- I really like dinosaurs

I have PTSD and sometimes I need to just stop. Usually pterodactyl means stop and let me see your face.
07/14/2010
Contributor: Red Vinyl Kitty Red Vinyl Kitty
We have always had a safe word, but I only used it once in 8 years, back when we were just beginning. To us, even if we never use it, there should always be one in place. Emergencies happen. To each their own.

Anyway, mine is squirrel! Lol.
07/14/2010
Contributor: Gallowraven Gallowraven
Quote:
Originally posted by Carrie Ann
We play like insane serial killers so I do have a safeword as "no" and "stop" and "i'm calling my lawyer" are often parts of the play. It is "powder".

I've only used it once in 8.5 years, ... more
We chose "mustard"
08/01/2010
Contributor: Sera Sera
Quote:
Originally posted by El-Jaro
There's an older post about safe words, but I thought a newer one would be better.

What safe words have you used? Which ones didn't work that well? Any make you burst out laughing?
I don't like safe words. I just say to stop, and he does. Or if I'm in pain, he always loses his erection immediately. We're not that great with BDSM because nothing about my pain turns him on, and nothing about his turns me on. So we're always soft about it. Nothing painful, ever.
08/01/2010
Contributor: MuffysPinguLove MuffysPinguLove
Our safe word is banana. I don't really know where it came from, but that's what we use
08/01/2010
Contributor: Jenna.J.Ross Jenna.J.Ross
our safe word is turkey.... it came about one day when we were driving and I was bitching about something that was annoying me and mid rant saw a wild turkey by the road and screamed turkey.He found it extremely amusing and somehow it just became our word to use.
08/01/2010
Contributor: RainbowOokami RainbowOokami
Pudding or banana was what my ex used but my new girlfriend and I haven't gotten to that point yet
07/10/2011
Contributor: Ms. Spice Ms. Spice
i only say stop but i'm kind of jealous of everyone else's words. they all must have great back stories to them
07/11/2011
Contributor: Ivy Wilde Ivy Wilde
Because of a story that a friend of ours told us about a BDSM incident, if my husband and I ever get into BDSM (which he wants to), our safe word will probably be "avocado" or more accurately as far as the story goes "avo-fucking-cado".
07/18/2011
Contributor: P'Gell P'Gell
I can't remember who it was, but someone I know and her partner used "David Hasselhoff" as a safe word. What a mouthful. (I still don't know if she was serious or not.)
07/18/2011
Contributor: Sex'и'Violence Sex'и'Violence
we used to use "stars" now we use "banana"
07/19/2011
Contributor: Pixel Pixel
If I'm playing with someone, the safeword is always 'red', as it's short and easy to remember. I don't have a safeword with Master, but if I *did*, it would definitely not be "DAMNIT! Motherf*cker, I hate you!". *ahem* That didn't end well for me.
07/19/2011
Contributor: Vanessa Weiss Vanessa Weiss
Quote:
Originally posted by ~LaUr3n~
No safe words, my partner and I communicate where we know boundaries before hand. IF something needs to stop...we say stop.
Yeah, that's us, too. I rarely will say "stop" or "no" in bed so those have sort of become our safe-words. Red, yellow, and "safeword" are all acceptable as well given that both of us are sort of conditioned to those being... well... safe words, and knowing what they mean/represent, having been in the scene for long enough.

When I am gagged or otherwise unable to vocally communicate, I use three quick taps on either him or the bed to communicate "STOP."

If I was playing with someone other than my partner, obviously "red, yellow, green" etc would be acceptable.
07/19/2011