How did the crowd react? (Assuming that you attended the seminar.)

So let's take the Cosmo example since it's a good example of what the average person would likely use if they knew nothing.

You hit your SO with a hairbrush after a shower. Let's say you don't know how strong you are and whack away. Let's say that person used to get beat with hairbrushes by their parent when they were a child and suddenly has a flashback. How do you think that person will feel? Or, hell, let's just say it hurts like a bitch and s/he is pissed off.

The stakes on how injured get higher the more you play. If you don't know what you're doing and go out and buy a crop, you could very seriously injure someone. Let's say you don't know anything and hit in the no-no places and cause internal bleeding. This is pretty common from what I hear with people who don't do research.

Pretty much the dangers range from a bad emotional response to a bad physical one. In the wrong hands some things could lead to death if not careful.

Then there's the consent issue you see so many people talking about. Why is consent so important? Because BDSM can be about pain, it can be about power, it can be about lots of things. If it's a S&M thing, if you don't get consent, you're abusing someone. If it's power control and you don't get consent you're an ass. And abusive in a different sort of way. Depending on how far things go, you could be torturing someone if you don't get consent. You could be raping them. Pinning someone down and forcing sex on them could be great for a sub - if you discussed it beforehand. Doing it to your SO without consent? Yeah, that's still rape. Rape is always so fun to deal with emotionally...

There are just countless examples of what could go wrong. Is it worth the risk? Yeah, probably not much is gonna happen if you're using toilet paper for bondage, but you never know if someone may have a negative reaction and never trust you again. Yeah, you may find you can expertly use a crop the first time, but what if you screw up and seriously injure a loved one?

Safe, Sane, Consensual. Rules to live by, really.

Kira pretty mu h hit the nail on the head.

People can become seriously hurt if they don't know what they're doing. If you're into bondage, that's great. If you know how to be safe. If you don't know what you're doing, you may not know you need safety scissors.What if you tie a knot too tight, and someone starts losing circulation. What if the house catches on fire, and you can't get someone untied fast. Sure, it's not that likely if you're being careful, but it's always good to know what can go wrong.

And there's always the emotional pain, like she said. What if someone says they're a willing sub, and they think they'll try anything, so the dom wants to try some humiliation, and she thinks "hey this can't be too bad", then s/he starts making fun of her, or degrading her. I for one would love that, but that could also seriously hurt someone's self-esteem.

There's also always the risk of other injuries, which was also mentioned. The thing about the crop is a big one. I've also been hit in the face by a flogger, because my husband aimed wrong. And we know what we're doing!

oh dear. i dont see this ending well

Oh yeah, it hurt. It wasn't as hard as he usually swings though, thankfully because he was hitting my upper back. One of the falls just wrapped around and -whack-

And that's very true. My husband is a little iffy on the whole thing. He likes to spank and flog me, and we've used blindfolds and little things like that, but there are a ton of fantasies that I keep secret because I know he'd think they were weird.

Not everyone is into that, and I'm sure it's going to end badly. Imagine someone knowing nothing about it telling their husband to flog them. Oh lord.

Probably because it was offered as an e-book first so that many readers could discreetly download the book and begin reading it.

DUDE! I'm SO gonna write that now!

Bahaha!
That would be great.

@ Mad's princess: I agree. I'd hope that people are trying to go about this the safe way, but I doubt they are. I have a friend who does sex toy parties, and she said that now all the sudden, tons of women want to have "Fifty Shades of Grey" themed parties. You can't just go to a toy party, and surprise your husband with a flogger later. These are things that need to be talked about.

@ Yaoi Pervette: First off, love your user name.
But yeah, you're very right. People really need to know who they are before they can jump into a BDSM relationship. Women are going to be seriously hurt. Then when they get into too much trouble about it, the blame is going to fall on the BDSM community.

I'm going to go with "no". Unless it's some new kind I've never heard of.
Leather toilet paper? Nah . . . .

Well they want you to "rip free of your restraints" or something along those lines. I know I could probably sneeze and rip TP though.

Do it do it do it! I'll help get the word out!

I agree 100%.
I don't see how people continue to take their horrid advice!

I'd say about 10 people left after no 'action' took place in the first five minutes of the seminar. The rest of the crowed looked a little confused when the words 'trust' and 'respect' were repeated several times, but appeared relieved when they were informed that most people don't live these roles 24/7. There seemed to be a lot of surprise when the head mistress came across as funny and personable instead of strict and cold.

That's interesting.
It's weird how it's so taboo and how people have these pre-set stereotypes about it all. It was really awesome of them to hold a seminar like that though.

agreed

From what I've seen on this and heard about 50 shades, people are being shown the lightest of light bdsm. It is a bit unnerving thinking that in the future I might date someone who claims to be into it, but then terrified of what I suggest.